By Dave Beekman
Fast Forward to year 2025… You have purchased a ‘Business Class’ ticket and are flying at 35,000 feet in a pressurized cabin and in need of a stiff drink since you heard the last announcement from your ‘Captain’… actually a ‘surrogate’ Captain as the real person flying your plane with 150 souls on board is actually sitting in an overstuffed Executive chair… one hand on the A-300 Airbus joystick and the other helping her 5 year old child with cursive writing homework… one eye on the flat screen monitor showing the progress of your plane since the Low Fuel light went on and the other… a mess the kid has made of his lunch….
Yep… It’s “Bring Your Kid To Work Week” and Captain ‘Flo’ (last names not revealed due to personal liability concerns) is ‘multi tasking’ if you want to call it that…
ALPA Union rules were negotiated to allow multi tasking of flight related functions like flying two planes at once and the Pilots union demanded a nursery and Day Care be added to the bunker they operate from in return… Hey… This is 2025.
Oh… The announcement the Captain just made…? “This is your Captain speaking.”
“We (actually you) have experienced a malfunction in the aircraft fuel system so we ask that you restore the tray in front of you and return your seat to the upright position so you can take full advantage of the cannabis mask that will drop from the overhead momentarily.”
“Please put your mask on first and then secure the mask of your children… if any.”
“We will be making an unplanned landing in a state where cannabis is legal so not to worry about the Police Fire and Rescue folks on the runway….. “If the landing is a little rough please be patient as I am actually landing two planes at once.”
“Have a Happy Day and thank you for flying NotAVirgin anymore Airways…”
Hey folks… This is not a joke… Remote pilots have been flying drones over Pakistan, Iran and Afghanistan… The State has been asked to allow drone testing flights all over Southern California… we take each step in stride just like we are trained to do from birth.
This is 2013… 2025 is only a dozen years away… Think the above scenario can’t happen? Think again and talk to your congressman and state legislators….