By Ishmael von Heidrick-Barnes
HITLER’S MUSTACHE
What happened to Hitler’s mustache?
Was it smuggled
out of Europe by American spies
inside SS Major Wernher von Braun’s cast
along with the Führer’s V-2 rockets?
Was the toothbrush launched to the moon
with Von Braun’s Nazi war crimes
on Apollo 11?
Did the soulstache escape to South America
via Vatican ratline?
Was it stitched
into the inner lining
of Cardinal Ratzinger’s skull cap,
empowering the former Hitler Youth
to excommunicate his way through ecclesiastical ranks to the Papacy?
What happened to Hitler’s mustache?
Did Stalin have it shipped to his dacha
as a war trophy?
Did the communist dictator wear it to bed?
Surprised to hear himself screaming,
“Sieg Heil” in the red heat of conquest?
Was it boxed up
inside Kremlin archives
during Cold War?
Did Bush
snatch the mustache from Putin’s
snow-capped eyes
causing both pussies to riot
setting mounds of hair on fire
What happened to Hitler’s mustache?