By Ernie McCray
Editor’s Note: Arizona Governor Jan Brewer yesterday vetoed the controversial SB 1062, the purported religious freedom bill that critics say would have allowed businesses to legally discriminate against gays and lesbians in the state.
Growing up in Arizona
I used to have simple dreams:
Eating in any cafe;
sitting anywhere in a movie theatre
or skating at the rink
at any time on any day;
attending any school
I could get myself to
and swimming in any pool.
I dreamed in a state
where black people like me
drove the city fathers insane
when we dared to
carry ourselves with dignity
in our constant struggle
to be free.
A change came
after a number of years had passed,
not a moment too fast.
Jim Crow was suddenly all shaken and aghast
along with his followers en masse
trapped in what, to them, was a smothering morass,
with nobody to harass,
in contrast with their past,
having run out of gas and pizzazz
and sass
like a big mouthed bass
hooked out of familiar waters
with a fisherman’s perfect cast
and their ideals were surpassed and bypassed
by a people whose task
was simply to rise out of second class
citizenship and nothing has,
in life, pleased me more
than all that funky jazz.
But this love song
wasn’t around very long
before new verses were written
wherein a populace
had trouble deciding whether or not
they could go along
with honoring a man who
brought love to our thinking:
Martin Luther King.
That got taken care of
and my heart again began to sing.
Then there came a time when loud
anti-discrimination became the thing.
SB1070 became a rallying cry
to rid the state of “illegals,”
aka aliens,
introducing racial profiling
as a lawful theme.
Then attacking all things
brown came on the scene:
Chicano studies
were attacked
and ended
and books were banned.
Arizona just can’t seem
to respect all the humanity
that beautifies our land.
And, now, with ethnic studies returned
the Grand Canyon state has taken
an unimaginable frightful stand
against gays and lesbians,
turning its madness
into cries of religious freedom,
wanting business owners
to not feel compelled to sell
their services to those whom
they see as beneath
them according to their so called spiritual beliefs
and yet another group of people
find the dreams that they seek to live free
with dignity
desperately deferred and blurred by lack of empathy
and I find myself entertaining
simple dreams once again,
wondering when
Arizona, my homeland,
resting out there upon
the firm and sacred ground of the mighty Sonoran,
will ever become at ease
with all of the universe’s humanity
breathing freedom’s air.
When will they dare
to find it in themselves to care?
P.S. Even though the governor
has vetoed a hateful bill
on this February day,
I hold close to my simple dreams
any old way
because in most cities in Arizona
it’s legal to discriminate against
and fire people who are gay.
So there’s no telling what might
come along in this state down the way.
But, I, as me and my buddies used to say,
“Hey, man, it sho nuff is true
that I ain’t got nothing else to do”
so I will be watching
my homefolks closely
until the last of my days
and, I’m hoping that amounts
to a beaucoup number of days.
Please, hear what I say.
Up in Phoenix, as a kid, all my friends had rifles and guns. A few were
MexAm. My cousin and I were relatively dark; his nickname was Nig,
but the schools we attended were bleached. I knew people who’d go out
and steal what they could put their hands on, whack people with clubs,
and lie and cheat but they were never jailed. One night I was riding
with two of them and we took one last turn through the giant parking
lot of a then-new and fashionable shopping center just so my peers
could satisfy themselves they done all they could to scare up some sort
of adventure and we came up on a couple of cars filled with neckers,
which drove 2/3rds of the car so crazy nuts one of them slapped the
side of the giant Olds coupe and the other roared, “Let’s beat them up
and take their women.”
It was either run with these people or hang around poolside with nerds.
Even then, in that baked hallucination called Arizona, people were of
three camps: white, privileged, boring and bored; white, privileged and
violent, and all the rest, left to suffer the other two. I got out when I
was 18.
nerds.
I split at 24, the day after I took an exam for my masters. I visit often, though.
thanks so much for sharing. This is well put. I marched in the South, carried picket signs, had a knife racked across my stomach was one of the first on the Greyhound bus when the laws changed. This is great food for thought.
God bless you.
Thanks for all that you’ve done for freedom for everyone.
Ernie, you go boy.
I am overwhelmed with the vibe coming out of Arizona in the last decade. Jan Brewer looks as mean as she acts and talks.
We all need to come together, not split apart, the art of being one human race.
Peace,
Daniel
It is truly an art: being one human race.
Good things, like nutritious vegetables and beautiful flowers grow best in full sunlight–like the kind that Arizona has–but so do weeds. As for the latter, they must be plucked out of the soil as soon as possible; before they take root. That’s what’s taking place, ever so repetitively in our home state. Thanks for the good word, Charlie Mack.
I’d like to think there’s hope for the Grand Canyon State folks. But I’ve been hoping that for over 70 years.
Thank you Ernie for sharing your poetic insight!
Another continuing great post by the “Silky Scriber.”
Ernie,
When my anger turns to hate, I think about you and what you write about the people of Arizona. I was a busboy in a Mexican restaurant in Tucson where the management would not serve Mexicans nor African Americans. A lot of those people were nuts. Other people go nuts about gays. I have two gay sons. That anger is turning into hate. Tucson was my college town. It was your home. I think about that and my hatred turns understanding. You understand the people of Arizona. Any movement needs government clout and economic clout. The combination resulted in the Governor’ decision. Immigration is next.
Arizona will work your emotions, won’t it?
As I’ve said before, the ARE some good things that come out of Arizona. Here is an oldie but goodie. The Meat Puppets from Phoenix.
http://www.amoeba.com/live-shows/detail-1347/
Dudes can jam!
Also out of Phoenix.
Arizona has always had a music scene. My dad was a part of it in the 30’s, 40’s and 50’s.
Perhaps AZ has such a good music scene as an escape from the other crap they (those who are not knuckleheads) have to put up with.
I think you hit it on the head.
Hello – Dean MacCorquodale (UA Honors College) passed this on to me. Fantastic. Powerful. Appreciated.
I really look forward to meeting you in San Diego on the 24th!
I’m looking forward to your visit. Bear Down!